dream to make believe.

i wish i would have known you before the world did.
before the world stole your soul.
i think i would have loved the way you used to be.
and i'm pretty sure you would have loved me too.
we could have made the world explode.
we would have been perfect for each other.
just like she's perfect for him.
i understand you. you think no one does, but i do.
i love the way you are.
but just seeing who you were before all this chaos
drives me insane.

countless 'maybe's.
endless 'what if's.
forever unanswered.

i'd like to believe that when we dream,
it's another world.
a whole new different world.
without all this imperfection.
without all these things stopping us from being together.
and i'd like to think that while i'm dreaming of you,
you're dreaming of me too.
we're together in that world.
and merely knowing that makes me happy.
ecstatic, in fact.

you are the reason why i wake up with a smile on my face.

i'd have to remember to thank you for that when i see you.

you get my teen heart beating faster.

he used to make my heart beat faster and slower at the same time.

at the moment, 2 men make my heart race.
one of them, unreachable. the other will never take me seriously.

"you will never cross paths with me."
and then you did.
and from then on, everything felt possible.
i felt like anything can happen.
i think you dreamt me alive.
and now, i feel invincible.
i think i might love you.

i never even noticed you.
until you noticed me, that is.
after so long, someone paid attention to me.
i was no longer invisible.
but it's all just a show. it can never be real.
i don't love you, though.
you just make my heart race so fast.
so fast that sometimes i think it's on the verge of exploding.
i want to fall in love with you. but i don't think i can.
i don't think you can, either.

sometimes i wish for you (to wish for me too).

I'm almost alive.

It feels great to have someone make your heart race 1298958947593759 miles per second.

Playful banter.
Shenanigans.
Parody.

I've learned to let go of all the hate and anger in my heart.
Just thinking of him makes me feel better.
It's nothing serious, really.
It sure ain't love.
It's just the feeling I get whenever I see him.
I feel like a little girl again, heart fluttering and all that jazz.
He makes me feel visible. After so many months of feeling inexistent in this world, being noticed feels like one hell of a rush.

Alive.

nice to know you.

GOODBYE.