i rode a bus a few days ago that had shit for parts.

i guess the lights inside it were controlled by the engine or something because whenever it’d slow down, the lights would go dim, and when it’d speed up, they’d go brighter.
the windows that are usually made of glass were made of cardboard.
if ever that bus would crash, you wouldn’t die from the impact of the crash, you’d die of tetanus.
at that moment in time, i thought to myself “i’m about as broken down as this bus.”
i wonder if my friends are afraid to be with me because i might bring them down too.

lately my thoughts have just been…scattered.
my heart has been all over the place, too.

“this time i’ll try not to show that i am not letting go.”

maybe i have shit for parts, too?

Yes? No?

toasted skin.

As I stared out at the place i call my home,
I wondered what it would be like when I leave,
Leave for a country that would not accept me with open arms.

We’re among the clouds.
There’s no turning back now.

I spent the whole day watching One Tree Hill. Then my mom came home with some treats from Starbucks. We just sat on the bed, snacked on Belgian Waffles, chugged down our Coffee Jelly, and teared up whenever Nathan and Haley would fight. I finally got her to like something I like. I’m glad.

One of the best days ever.

It could all be so simple.

i would give anything

To stay in that moment
to be in your arms
to breathe the same air
to feel loved by you for even a moment.

get outta my head

veiny hands
dark eyes
chapped lips.

signs of (di)stress.
you make it harder for me to go on with my life.

i want you OUT.

one step at a time.

Why is it that others believe in us more than we believe in ourselves?

They say “you can do it” and we say “impossible.”